Well, so a BBFR journalist is a person that tries to steal someone else’s life, fame, honour, love and even sometimes their mobiles or money–rare cases in developed countries but a very common case in the ‘un or ‘under’ developed countries. So according to this definition of a BBFR journalist, the meaning of BBFR journalist’s story is ‘ a written testimony or a sad tale of someone’s lost life, fame, honour and love. But not of lost mobiles or money because then the tale would become the BBFAR journalist’s own sad tale.
Like every other profession BBFR journalism also has some rules. Five very important rules. To clearly illustrate my point, let us start from the very beginning.
The first and the most important rule to become a BBFR journalist is ” Don’t ever care about the results-either bad or good!” When a BBFR journalist thinks of doing a hard hitting story he actually needs a ‘story’. So he follows the second rule i.e gets a juicy news. It can be a fact,which in this case is rare, a rumor spread by the ‘enemy’ or a truely and completely false story made by a genious i.e the BBFR journalist himself. Now when he has the perfect story, for example, a certain celebrity is a ‘party animal’ , ‘a gay’ ,’a drunkard’ or ‘a hotel room trasher ‘ etc, he strikes! which is the thrid rule. Go on to a newspaper or mag to get it published, if you already don’t own a ‘gossip column’ in a newspaper or mag or even better your own ‘gossip show’ on tv. Now that you have screamed it out the fourth rule is to be applied. Wait!. Wait for the response of the people, being totally content at heart that you’ll obviously succeed as who can resist such a juicy news and people love gossip. But keep in mind that your success depends on the vile-o-meter, the more vile the news the more successful you’ll get.
So now after you have succeeded i.e gotten all famous and rich (bling bling baby!) the time for your fifth and last rule is here. Apologize. Yes! you heard it right. Apologize. Say that you are really sorry. You should have looked into the matter before publishing it, as its not true..blah blah blah. And Voila! You are good in public eye, rich in pocket and famous!
Its a 100% guarantee that you’ll succeed if you follow these BBFR journalism rules and the best part of that there is no harm in it–not to you atleast- except that you would have totally ruined a person’s happy life and maybe even a few more lives related to that person. Okay, its a little or maybe a little more than a little harmful. But who cares! You all know the first rule ” Don’t ever care about the results-either bad or good!” and by that I meant that either its good or bad for the celebrity. I mean who cares even if the result is a suicide by that person. Its just one ‘less’ person on the earth. The main thing is that you got what you wanted! So stop kvetching and have fun with all the bling bling!
Happy BBFR journalism!